When was the last time you felt like you?
I always hated when people called me perfect. I knew I was full of flaws that no one knew about. Not even on the inside. I had my demons. Depression, anxiety, insecurities and resentment flowed through my body like a never ending river. It never felt like a compliment. It felt like a demand.. a demand that if I wasn’t perfect I couldn’t be anything else. I just wanted to me be. I didn’t want to be perfect.. and I definitely didn’t want to be pictured as what I should be. I wanted to be full of flaws without feeling ugly or unattractive. I’ve come to realize my imperfections are my perfections So that’s the only way I will accept that compliment. I am full of imperfect perfections. That’s perfectly fine to me. What about you?
I ask God to forgive me for what I have done wrong in my past. I ask him to help others forgive me of any hurt that I have put upon them. Hurt people.. hurt people. It’s not an excuse, but I was hurting tremendously. I wish I could take things back, but I know I would not be who I am today without a few lessons. I understand karma takes its path. I understand I may have went through it already, but it may still come back around.. again. I am sorry. Please forgive me for my wrong doings. I am only human. I make mistakes. I have learned. No one deserves to go through pain. Please open your arms to me. For I am not the same person I was then. I am.. mending.
Think about that one risk you took that changed your life forever. The one that altered your perspective of life. Would you go back and make the same choice or keep things the way they are? When you make certain decisions sometimes the outcome is not always going to be what you wanted. It’s up to you to accept any consequences that comes with your choices.
Experiencing life without knowing yourself can make you feel like you’re very far away from home, and a bit of an outsider. You feel distant and alone even though you’re surrounded by so many people everyday. What most people don’t know is that being around a lot of people can cause an identity crisis. When you’re trying to fit in with those around you, you start trying to be like them without even noticing. You won’t be yourself because you don’t think your authentic self is worthy of being on the outside. Eventually when people realize that life is actually what you make it, then the faster they will learn to love their true self. While on their journey to self love, they will make their way to their “Home Sweet Home”, where they won’t ever have to feel alone. Self love starts with you, no one else. So start your journey now and stick to it. I’m cheering for you.
The darkness isn’t something that should separate us from the world, but instead make us more powerful. Being in a depressive state can really alter your mind, body and soul in a traumatic way. Coming out of a dark place is one of the hardest things a human can ever go through. If you are able to conquer that with some help or even by yourself, it’s amazing and I’m so proud of you. Once you finally get out of that place, the light will be the brightest you will ever see. Please don’t give up. You’re almost there.
The day you choose yourself instead of choosing other people, is the day that you will become your true self. People always think that their happily ever have to be a romantic thing between them and another person. In actuality your happily ever suppose to begin with yourself. Always choose you. Always love and protect yourself. Be your number one fan and have your happily ever after.
Who would have ever thought that our souls would be attracted to one another. I’m tied to you. My heart won’t let you go even if I tried. The universe told me we crossed paths before, but I had no idea it would be you. I feel your energy even when you’re not around. I feel your sadness, your happiness and even your desires. Everything is set for us.. in due time we will know our true destiny. I believe in your faith.. I believe in you. My biggest concern is do you believe in me?
When I think of you my heart begans to beat like no other. My mind starts to create these scenarios wondering how life would be if you were here with me. You weren’t with me long, but I swear I had already knew you. Everything came so fast.. everything. The days, the time.. the moments all went right past me. My heart wanted to beat for you until eternity… and it still will. You are forever with me. I love you.. don’t forget me.
I’m slowly forgetting.. forgetting about the days when I use to think I wasn’t enough for you. Forgetting the days I hated myself because of you. I’m slowly forgetting the days I cried myself to sleep because of the words you said to me. It hurt.
I’m remembering that you weren’t enough for me. I’m remembering it wasn’t I that I hated, but you for tearing me down when I felt vulnerable. I’m remembering how dry my eyes were every night before I met you. The happiness.. I’m remembering who I was before you broke me.
You are born with empty hands. It is up to you to fill them with something that you can be committed to. A commitment without meaning starts with empty hands and ends with disappointment. Promises, I love you’s and investments should be a forever that stays with you until death. Never commit if you can’t fully commit.
Sometimes I feel helpless like it’s just me against the world. I’ve come to the realization that it kinda just works that way for me . I try not to seek help from anyone even when I’m struggling, because my struggles can get thrown back into my face. I can hurt for a little while because I know I will eventually help myself at the end.
Treat yourself. Take care of yourself. Believe in yourself. Adore yourself. Be yourself. Love yourself.